Valentine's Day 2023 is finally here! And for many, it's no laughing matter. After all, you have serious pressure to find the best Valentine's Day gift and plan the perfect dinner. Or maybe you're single and feeling anti-Valentine's Day this year. Well, there's no better way to lighten the mood than with a Valentine's Day pun, the cornier the better! Find a funny love quotes or Valentine's Day joke to write in a card or share as a Valentine's Day captions for Instagram. Your loved ones are sure to laugh. This list has plenty of jokes for kids, adults, students, and coworkers.
We've got puns about food ("love you from my head tomatoes"), puns about dogs and other animals ("you're one in a chameleon"), and even a few science puns ("I sulfur when you argon")—enough to appeal to just about everyone's sense of humor (especially if you appreciate dad jokes). Whether you need a silly message of love to share with your friends, your family members, or that super special someone, we’ve got you covered with the best Valentine’s puns that will have your loved ones laughing–or cringing–all day long.
P.S. On the hunt for something a little more romantic? Try our best Valentine's Day quotes.
Valentine's Day Heart Puns
- Don't play heart to get.
- I can heart-ly wait to see you.
- You're my tweet-heart.
- You stole my heart and now you're under cardiac arrest.
- My love for you is never in vein.
- You don't have to be a locksmith to have the key to my heart.
- You don't miss a beat.
- I wear my heart on my sleeve. That's why I never wear a tank top.
Valentine's Day Food Puns
- Give me a hug and a quiche.
- I'll never dessert you.
- I simply donut know what I'd do without you, Valentine.
- I only have fries for you.
- Brie mine.
- You got a pizza my heart.
- Olive you so much.
- You melt me.
- My heart beets for you.
- Love you so matcha.
- I think you're grate.
- Pie like you berry much.
- I love you s'more and s'more.
- You're simply my jam.
- Love you from my head tomatoes.
- We're mint to be.
- You make miso happy.
- Words can't espresso how much I love you.
- You are one in a melon.
- Will you peas be mine?
- I a-peach-iate you.
- We make a great pear.
- Happy Valentine's Day, cute-tea!
- I have a whole latte love for you.
- Let's canoodle.
- You've got me tongue-tied.
- I love you a waffle lot.
- You are the loaf of my life.
- To my butter half on this Valentine's Day.
Valentine's Day Animal Puns
- I turt-ally love you.
- You are the deer-est Valentine of all.
- Meow and forever, I love you.
- I'm not lion: You're the love of my life.
- You octopi my heart and mind.
- You are o-fish-ally the cutest.
- No bunny compares to you, Valentine.
- Seal-ed with a kiss.
- I ruff you.
- You're one in a chameleon.
- We need each otter.
- Owl always love you.
- You're my pup of tea.
- Rhino you're the one for me.
- Bee mine?
- Can't bear life without you.
- You're my otter half forever.
- You give my life porpoise, Valentine.
- I'm not lion when I say my Valentine is the best.
Nature-Themed Valentine's Day Puns
- I lichen you a lot.
- I'm pining fir you.
- I'm falling for you, so please never leaf me.
- You rock.
- I love you so moss.
- Tell me you beleaf in love, Valentine.
- You are tree-mendous.
- There's so mushroom in my heart for you.
- Aloe you vera much.
- This Valentine's Day doesn't succ, thanks to you.
Crafty Valentine's Day Puns
- I love you with all my art.
- You’re the highlight of my day!
- You’re sew special to me.
- I love you sew much!
- Wool you be mine, Valentine?
- I wool always love yew.
- You color my world.
- I think you are just write, Valentine.
Math and Science Valentine's Day Puns
- I sulfur when you argon.
- You’re as sweet as Pi.
- When I tell you how much I love you, I'm not overreacting.
- Are you a 90 degree angle? Because this feels just right.
- You're acute Valentine.
- We’ve got serious chemistry.
- My love for you simply radiates.
- I've been thinking of U periodically.
- I aorta tell you how much I love you.
- Are you a 30 degree angle? Because you're acute-y.
- You're the ruler of my heart.
Katie Bowlby is Digital Director at Country Living, where she covers gift guides, product reviews, crafts, and TV shows like Yellowstone. She’s currently stitching up a cross-stitch pattern for the magazine’s next issue
